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Day 042 — Visitor Residences
Can't you see that i wanna be there with open arms
It's empty tonight and i'm all alone
Get me through this one
Morgan,
The President is elected. The have democracy here. And he's a painter. He paints. They understand the soul. These people have to be good, more like us then the Trikru ever could be, but… They keep telling me you're dead. You're not dead.
I'd know. I'd feel it and die too. Or I'd feel it and know. But you're not dead. I won't let you be dead. I can't live through this without you. This mountain… I feel like its coming down around me all the time.
Don't get me wrong, I'm sleeping. They have me on some medication for that. And they aren't evil people. Doc K is nice. Scarlett is nice… though Scarlett is afraid of me going to Medical.
Do you notice i'm gone?
Where do you run to so far away?
But I still dream about you. They aren't the nightmares. But I dream of you. I dream crazy, impossible things: you and Mom together. Trying to talk to me. She's dead, you're not, you've never known her. Eden, Morgan, how I wish I could have you known her. She would wrap her arms around you and hold you so close.
I want you to know that I miss you I miss you so
I want you to know that I miss you I miss you so
I'm so angry with Ruth I can barely see straight. If Reno were not so… innocent, I'd be furious with him too. How can they just forget you all? Our people? The One Hundred? Don't you matter to them? They're making lives. Making a place for themselves. And I don't know if I'll ever not look at them with a little bit of hatred for doing it.
You're all out there. You and my Dad. How dare they be happy? How dare they just… abandon you? Is this betrayal?
Are they betraying you?
I'm writing again these letters to you aren't much, I know
But i'm not sleeping and you're not here
The thought stops my heart
No… They're wrong, but they aren't betraying you. If I ever let you go, I would. But I never will. Faith in love. That's something Mom used to say to me. Faith in Love. Believe in the people you love and keep faith with them. Never lie, never betray your word, never forget those you love: what you love defines you and tells the world who you are. Love gives strength.
I love you.
But… its hard, Morgan.
Do you notice i'm gone?
Where do you run to so far away?
The President has offered video proof time and again. He's elected: they have a democracy in here. No Council. A democracy. He's a painter, too. I'm painting. Really painting. With paint.
I can't watch the videos because he's so sure— they're all so sure— you're gone. I know you're not. You fight, Morgan. You're like me. Survival. We do whatever it takes. We don't get angry, we get sharp: when someone stands up against us we are smarter, faster, sharper then them. You're out there. They're wrong.
But I miss you so. I miss you like I miss breathing, Morgan. I miss you like I miss laughter.
I want you to know that I miss you I miss you so
I want you to know that I miss you I miss you so
I want you to know that I miss you I miss you so
I want you to know that I miss you I miss you so
No more looking i've found home
I want you to know that I miss you I miss you so
I want you to know that I miss you I miss you so
I want you to know that I miss you I miss you so
I want you to know that I miss you I miss you so
I'm gone away
I'm gone away
I'll find you again. Nothing will get in my way. I… wait. There's alarms. Something has happened. Something important, I don't know what. Containment? They have such strict protocols— I understand them, but really— but don't forget. I'm here.
I'm waiting for you.
Find me.
Find me, Morgan.
Find me.