Day 024: Kai Fathers Day
Summary: Kai realizes it's almost Father's Day, and given she doesn't know if she'll live to see it, sends a little thought to her dad.
Date: 06/18/2016
Related: Best Laid Plans and other Father's Day Memoirs

Day 024 — Unknown

So, here we go again.

It's that time of the year, and, laughably, I find myself thinking of you. Well this year, dad, I might not live to see Father's Day. And now, when my mind needs to be on other things, for some fucked up reason I still can't escape you. So here it goes.

Dear dad, I hate you. If I could I'd watch you choke on your own teeth. I can't go a day without hearing your criticism on every decision I make. Without seeing that look on your face, like you'd smash the door cycle button yourself and watch me vanish into the darkness. Like you wish I'd never been. If you were mad before, I got a whole new bunch of reasons for you to float me now. I've hit people, cos I felt like it. I shot people, and I don't feel guilty about it. That boy you said wasn't good enough? I'm fucking him now. I'm friends with murderers, thieves and Ark traitors.. and I'd choose any one of them over you in a heartbeat. Sorry your precious Adams legacy is ruined. Not.

And yet, you annoying fucking asshole, it's thanks to you that I'm even still alive. An Adams doesn't give up. An Adams does what needs to be done. Keep your eyes open Kyler. There's always time to train Kyler. No excuses Kyler, an Adams doesn't make mistakes. How did Fugai win the battle of Boju, Kyler? What was Napoleon's mistake at Waterloo? Never thought I'd have a use for that shit. Never imagined this.. and yet somehow it feels more natural.. more normal than the Ark ever did.

So, dear dad, it's almost fucking Father's Day again. And so you know I might be marching to my death to protect a girl I barely know, the boy you hated and a bunch of fucking criminals. And I think I finally understand what responsibility really means. So thank you, Tyler Adams, and go fuck yourself, cos I'm no longer an Adams.

I'm Kai kom Skaikru.

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